Monday, May 28, 2012

Meanings of Love and Styles of Cohabitation

This week in class we learned about love and how there are various meanings of love. 

Storge: love between parent and child
Philia: love that exists between friends; brotherly love
Eros: love between a man and a woman; sexual, emotional, passion or romance
Agape:  love beyond what you feel about them. 

While discussing these various meanings of love, my teacher asked which one should we have towards our spouse. The majority of the class responded all of them. All of these types of love allow us to grow closer to our to our companion. They are important to keep a marriage strong and also to have a healthy marriage.



This week we also talked a lot about dating and the importance of dating many people. Obviously dating has a different meaning for people. But in this case dating is going out with someone and getting to know them, this does not include sexual intercourse. 

I really liked something my teacher mentioned in class, he said "Dating is not just about testing but developing your skills." Many believe that when we date someone it is just about seeing if we are compatible with the individual, to see if we like their qualities and so on. But while we are dating we are trying to polish our own qualities and even develop new qualities like patience, charity, humility and so on.


We also discussed the reason's why individuals tend to cohabit rather than get married. There are various myths out there. People believe that by cohabiting they are reducing the risk of divorce because they are going to "test the waters" first. But in reality, and various studies have shown this, those who cohabit before getting married have 3x's likely of getting divorced when they do marry! I wonder if people were informed about this that they would opt for marriage rather than just cohabit.Not only do these couples have higher risk of divorce but they also have higher rates of violence and abuse.


There are 4 styles of Cohabitation:


1. Precursor to marriage: these are couples that are already engaged and have definite plans of marriage.
2. Coresidential  daters: they dislike living the single life and opted to move with someone even though they were uncertain about how long term the relationship will be.
3. Trial cohabitors: they intend at some point to marry but are not fully committed to their current partner to expect cohabitation to end up in marriage.
4. Alternative to marriage: individuals who are more committed to partner than to marriage.

It was interesting to learn about these various topics this week, it once again made me realize the importance of marriage and doing things in the proper order. Many of the times we wonder why have so much heartache in life but we do not realize that its because we are not following the plan that has been set for us. I have a great testimony about marriage and the importance it plays in an individuals life and future generations as well. I know that marriage is part of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christs plan for us, if we do things in the proper order we will have joy and happiness for all eternity.



Saturday, May 19, 2012

The importance of Gender

This week in class we talked about Gender. We discussed a lot about the different traits that most men and women have like:

Men:
Aggressive
Competitive
Spatial Orientation
Task Orientation

Women:
Cooperative
More nurturing
Relationship based
Detail Orientation
Landmark Orientation

While we talked about the different attributes between men and women, I realized how important each gender is to our society and especially to Heavenly Father. Both men and women have an essential role in our society. It breaks my heart to see that men and women are competing to see who is better when in reality they are both equal. Yes, men and women may play a different role and we are a bit different from each other but we are still equal!! The responsibilities that each gender has are so important and I think we take that for granted.

I'm grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ because through it I have learned the importance of my role as a woman and the responsibilities that come with my gender. I have the greatest blessing to help Heavenly Father's spirit children come to this earth and obtain bodies. But the best part is that they will get to be a part of my eternal family. I get to teach them Heavenly Father's plan and about our loving Savior Jesus Christ.

Another blessing is that I do not have to do this alone. I will be able to have my amazing husband there to help me. Both my attributes as a woman and Rob's attributes as a man will help us raise our children and return to our father in heaven. How grateful I am to know the importance of my gender and that it wasn't a coincidence, it has part of a heavenly plan. It was part of our loving Heavenly Father's plan so we can return home to him.


Saturday, May 12, 2012

The importance of Family

Ever wondered why we have families and if they are important?

This week in my Family Relations class, I learned families are not just important they are essential! Each individual becomes who they are in society because of the family they grew up in. The structure and teaching in a family are very important because it has a great impact on a child's life and future.

I realized the importance of marriage because our children the right to be born to parents committed to each other. Similarly, children have a right to have both mom and dad with them to love them and take care of them. I also realized that we must do all in our power to avoid divorce because it does have an enormous impact on children. 

I also learned the importance of getting an education because our children will follow our example and strive to be educated as well. Getting an education also allows are children to get better jobs and be able to be in a better social class. This is not just me saying this because I'm a Mormon. There is so much research that has been done for years that backs up what I'm saying. This research allows us to see how these things do make a difference in our families.

I'm so grateful for the knowledge I have gained about families through the gospel and science. I have the gospel of Jesus Christ and science confirming to me that families are essential. What we do in our families and the principles we teach in our families are so important in the development of our children because they will follow our example. I'm so grateful for being able to learn about these things now so I can better prepare myself when I become a mother.